5 Affirmations of self-love to help you discover who you are

Hello everyone, I guess fate wanted me to rewrite this story. I have been working on this article for a while. But I accidentally lost the entire story. It's a bummer yet I was so motivated to share this self-growth process with all of you that I have no choice but to rewrite this article. It won't be the same as the one that I lost. But ironically from failures, we learn, and the article that I lost was so motivating that I don't mind trying again. Even if that means starting all over. After all new beginnings have often laid foundations for great creations. So in memory of the blog stories that I lost and accidentally deleted, here is a better one. I present to you 5 affirmations of self-love. A series that I am starting this year inspired by the new self-love rituals that I apply in my life. The results so far have been impressive. Give it a try and you'll notice it for yourself.  Every week I will be posting 5 new affirmations of self-love. Are you starting the journey with me? I can already tell that it will be an interesting experiment. Subscribe to my blog to make sure that you don't miss future self-love articles. Let's start 2021 off with some positive vibes. I hope everyone is staying safe during this pandemic. Let's all do our part to stop this disease from spreading. I know it gets boring during these lockdowns. But I don't want to get gloomy and I assume that you guys don't want to see it that way as well. So for me, I make use of my time by doing some introspection and self-reflection. It also gives me the opportunity to work on myself. Every week I am going to try a new self-love exercise and share it with you guys. It's high on my priorities list for 2021. Affirmations of self-love are very important because when you feed your mind with positive thoughts it rewires itself. We can reprogram our mental state to live happier and more productive lives. Only an inspired soul can create, so in order to bring out the best quality from our essence, we must keep our souls and minds inspired. To do this is challenging for most people, even I had a period where I found it very challenging. But my friends I have come to find out the hard way that it all starts with self-love.  For this exercise, you will need a mirror and a notebook or a private diary to keep track of progress.

               1. I deserve to be loved by myself and others

We are starting this exercise with affirmation number one. It is also one of the most important affirmations on this list. That's why I decided to place it at number one.  Hold the mirror in front of you and remind yourself that you deserve to be loved by yourself and others. Let me go into depth and explain this. You guys are going to get to know my philosophical side on this blog. At the base of insecurity lies the fear of abandonment. If there is one thing we can be sure of it is that fear is an invitation for doubt. Once we start doubting our own abilities and skills we start placing our essence into a box. Essence must not be confined, it must be free. Energy is free, and we can only guide it with our minds. In that same way, we must guide our soul, heart, and mind into a state of understanding for ourselves and the story that we have lived through. Your journey deserves appreciation for the positive moments that you have experienced and for the strength that you mustered to get through the negative experiences. We must find balance on the inside and in order for you to find that balance you must be willing to reflect on your journey, this will help you to understand your own strength. When you do this you will discover puzzle pieces of who you are. 

Write down these puzzle pieces for they are your core and they will remind you of the following things: 

               A.What you stand for

               B.What you want to achieve

               C. And what dreams you still wish to pursue.

 These puzzle pieces put together will form an image. This image will inspire you to follow your heart and to make your dreams come true. Many people have proven that with effort, hard work, confidence, and a plan their dreams are becoming a part of their reality. Look at the guests that we have had on Storytime for example. Now you must be wondering how do I recognize the puzzle pieces of my identity? I have developed a system to help you recognize them easier. It's all part of the many things that my intuition picks apart in my quiet moments. Ask yourself the following questions :

•  What are important life lessons that I have learned on my journey?
•  What has hurt me the most in life and how did I deal with it?
• What are my strengths and how do I apply them into my daily life?
• Who do I value and why do I value them?
• What makes me happy?
• What makes me sad?
• What did I learn from my disappointments?
• What is my passion?
• Who am I?

These may seem like simple questions but the answers that we will fill in will shape the image of who we are and it can even be a good guide towards finding your purpose in life. I will explain why it's important for you to ask yourself these questions. Write down your answers in a private diary or journal that you can use for frequent self-reflection sessions. Introspection can be so addictive if you do it the right way. You might find yourself constantly discovering new traits and interesting facts about yourself. I believe that having a purpose in life gives guidance. You need to know the destination in order to find the right route on the map of life. Now let me move on to explaining the importance of these questions so that I can help you find your destination and hopefully inspire you on your journey.

 What are important life lessons that I have learned on my journey?

I always keep saying that we are the only ones who know our entire story. Other people might just see a part of your life but they haven't lived your life. So they have no idea through how many or what kind of muddy pits you have had to drag your shoes into. Everyone has their own dilemmas that they face, their own demons that they must confront. No human being is perfect, we all have our own scars. We all have had to face different kinds of painful events in our reality. Yet these events are what shape us. Sometimes we must go through extreme pain before we can be reborn as something new. That is if you can find the strength to pull through these turbulent tests of life. To live is to experience great joy and great pain. That is the balance of life, I immediately think of Yin and Yang. One can simply not exist without the other. In some cases, it might even be that we were in stressful situations that we thought we wouldn't solve or get out of but still, we managed to pull through another day. I strongly believe that all the experiences we go through in life shape us. From experience, we gain knowledge, and in this knowledge, we find our boundaries and we discover our strengths and the person that we have become. The lessons that we learn on our journey shape our values. It has an impact on what we chose to hold onto and what we can allow to let go of. Write down all the important lessons that life has taught you. This will help you gain more insight into how your experiences affect the way you make decisions in life.

                        What has hurt me the most in life and how did I deal with it?

Self-reflection and self-love go hand in hand. It's a process that requires us to sometimes dig up old wounds that we didn't want to confront. Facing our emotions can be a scary journey for some people. But it's something each of us has to face. Especially if you're searching for healing. Healing is the destiny of each and every self-love journey. We might have different wounds but we are all looking for the same medicine. A medicine that brings improvement and relief. A release from the pain. Just in the same way that it hurts when you apply medicine for an open wound, in that same way it will hurt to bring up old memories that contain the pain. These are often the memories we wish to ignore, forget and even block from our minds. Yet going back is very important. For in these painful experiences you will find the cause of your toxic traits. The origin of most toxic traits lies in the pain that caused us to adopt these toxic traits. Everyone has toxic traits, we have already established that perfection is an illusion that cannot be defined. The moment toxic traits get in the way of you being able to experience happiness is the moment you should realize that you have to let go of these toxic traits. Because the point of affirmation number one is that you deserve love, and if you deserve to receive love it means that you deserve to be happy. If you want to be happy you have to fight to be happy. If you're going to battle, you might as well recognize the strong warrior that's hiding on the inside. Because you have learned through your experiences now. No need to be harsh on yourself if you have had weak moments in between. It only means that you are human and that it's okay for you to experience pain. Like all of us wandering on this planet you are experiencing life. Take along the beautiful moments as well to keep a steady balance. Reflect on your past actions, and on what hurt you. Expose the toxic traits for what they are by being honest to yourself no matter how much it hurts. Make sure you forgive yourself as well. To error is to be human, we can only learn and evolve just as our ancestors have. Have you adopted some bad habits due to the painful experiences that you have had to endure? Write them down, and write how they affect your ability to experience happiness or how they get in the way of you pursuing your dreams. Self-sabotaging is real, most people just aren't aware of it, because they hide the painful memories or run away from their own emotions. Facing it will sting just like applying medicine to a fresh open wound. But after the pain comes the healing. Prevent your life from becoming like an infection. It shouldn't eat away at you. It should inspire you and motivate you to keep going and to become stronger. In facing your pain you will discover the strength of the warrior that lives inside of you. 

                  What are my strengths and how do I apply them into my daily life?

Remember the principle of Yin and Yang? There must be a balance, after looking and reflecting on the bad we must recognize the good. Recognizing the good will make you discover the strengths and skills of the warrior living inside of you. In my case, I call her Queen, and yes I have developed a little ego about it. What's wrong with confidence anyone? Positive self-talk keeps your energy going and has a lot of benefits. Ha, kids and adults laughing at me when I used to talk to myself as a kid! Look it up, and then form an opinion.  Our souls must be fed with inspiration. So we may dream in the direction that our inspiration pulls us towards. We all have diverse tastes when it comes to the things that inspire us. I believe this influences how and what we dream of.  It is after all the warrior living inside of us that will fight for our dreams, aspirations, and goals. There is a beast inside that knows how to act on the instinct of survival. Learn to befriend it and tame it, to get an advantage over your own life. Decide what it is that the warrior living inside of you is willing to fight for. Once you have a goal, you have a vision. When you have a clear vision you can align it with your purpose in life. Because this vision gives direction to the goals we have set for ourselves and the dreams that we dare to dream. Forget what society or the outside world thinks about for a minute. The real question is what makes you happy, will you be happy, and are you happy? Our life on this planet is very short. Minutes seem like seconds and days pass as if they were hours. We must learn to appreciate the life that we have. We can do this by enjoying the moment while feeding our purpose. Nothing will help you get there faster than knowing what your strengths are and applying them at the same time. After all, practice makes perfect, you could be fluent in a language and not speak it for three years and I bet you that you won't be as fluent as you were when you had to speak it every day. Everyone has their own talents, it's a matter of respecting who we are so that we may discover our talents and are able to explore them. For we might not know how expressing our strengths could benefit the world. If Albert Einstein never mastered his skill, could you imagine how different the world would be right now? I could name a couple of more examples, but you guys get my point. Don't be afraid to discover who you are, it's a journey you won't regret.

                           Who do I value and why do I value them?

There is this saying that I love for a reason. It goes " Show me who your friends are, and I'll show you your future!".  I apply this theory to life like a professor! I guess you could say I have observed many people throughout my life. But seriously people warn you about friends all the time for a reason. Don't be stubborn like I once was in my younger years. Let me lay it down for you. Why is it important to evaluate who you value and why you value them? To put it simply who you value says everything about the relationships you uphold in life. What it is you are and aren't willing to tolerate from the people close to you. Who you value says everything about your preferences, why you value them is a reflection of your own values. So when you answer this question you are explaining to yourself what it is that you value and appreciate in the relationships that you maintain, and what you seek from the relationships that you form in life. If you are aware of these things it becomes much easier to not waste time on meaningless relationships. When you know what you want in life, you don't waste time waiting for all the things that you don't want in life. It becomes easier for you to place boundaries. Only when we start practicing boundaries do we realize who is really there for us and who isn't. Because the people that care about you will always want to see you grow.

                              What makes me happy?

Fact: Everyone wants to be happy. Another fact: Everyone has a different definition of happiness. To be happy means that you have to decide that you want to be happy. Once you have decided that you want to be happy it's easier to find out what makes you happy. What gives you joy in life will feed your soul with a powerful strength that will push you to keep moving forward. Some people find happiness in the relationships they uphold, others find it by exercising hobbies that motivate them. For others, it's exploring the world and going on as many adventures as possible. Some prefer to spend time with their loved ones. It's important to be aware of the things that bring us joy, so that we may create more pleasant moments in life.  List all the things in your life that make you happy and try doing more of these things so that you can stay inspired. Often we get distracted by the negative experiences. Once we are distracted we tend to get overwhelmed by it and forget the positive things that we experience. If you can't look at the good, you can't enjoy or appreciate the beautiful moments. Because then you stop looking for the good things that are often hidden in the moments that we let pass.

                                                             What makes me sad?

I think that having a healthy balance is very important in life. That's why I also think that it's important to know what makes you sad as well.  I look at pain as a defense mechanism of the human body. The brain is the operating system that runs it. If you have a software problem it will negatively impact the way your hardware functions. Experiencing emotional pain will influence your physical health. Everyone has experienced some form of stress and sadness. It's a part of life, but knowing what hurts will also give you an insight into what it is that your soul can't tolerate.  When you know what hurts you, you become aware of situations that you should prevent from repeating. You know what you are willing to tolerate and what you shouldn't. Simply because it isn't healthy for your mental and physical state. Write down all the things that cause you pain, and identify the triggers. Once you know what these are you know what to heal and what boundaries you should keep in place for yourself.

             What did I learn from my disappointments? 

Now that you have done some self-reflection and are aware of what makes you sad you already know what and or who for whatever reason has disappointed you in life. But even these disappointments carry lessons with them. Be aware of what life and the universe is trying to teach you. Identify what boundaries you should keep in place to keep situations from repeating themselves. Examine the behaviors that should be changed in order for you to improve your life. Write all of these behaviors down and make resolutions for yourself regarding the way you wish to change your life. By knowing what's preventing you from growing, you know what needs to be done. Don't beat yourself up for the things that happened. Just be aware of them and take the experience along.

                                  What is my passion?

To be aware of one's passion is to be aware of one's desire.  When you are aware of what makes you happy or sad and what your strengths are you have found all the tools that you need to achieve your goals. Now my question is what is your goal in life? A simple question that I have asked many people. Most of them didn't have an answer. What are you willing to fight for? What do you wish to achieve in life? To have a passion that you wish to pursue means that you have a purpose. Having a purpose will help you find meaning in life.  What gives your life meaning? This can be an entire list of things. Note them down, for in them lies the theme of your purpose. Write down what the theme is.

                                        Who am I?

Most people struggle with finding themselves. Well my friend the answer lies in all the previously mentioned questions. All the answers you have filled in have drawn a painting. If an art lover were to admire your painting, in these answers of yours they would see the core of who you are. The experiences that have shaped you, the lessons you learned, the qualities you possess, and in sadness we find even your weakest moments. Knowing who you are is important, it means you are aware of your positive and negative traits. Being aware creates opportunities for improvement. Insight is gained into who you are and what you stand for. Knowing who you are will give you the confidence and strength to continue on your life journey.

                             2. My dreams and aspirations are valid

You have to be aware of your own dreams and aspirations. Your dreams are worth chasing. Do not let anyone reflect their own insecurities onto you. Do not let their lack of belief in the skills that you possess and can develop become your lack of confidence. Write down your dreams and continue reminding yourself that you have found a purpose in life. A purpose that you wish to fulfill. In order for you to reach that purpose, you must have full confidence in yourself and the faith that your dreams and aspirations are worth following. Turn them into your own reality by taking control of your life. At the end of the day, it is your life and you don't want to end up having regrets. Start small, it's the small things that will build up your success in life. Note down the actions that you have to undertake in order for you to turn your aspirations into your reality. Break it down into small goals and start today instead of tomorrow or next week. If you really want it, you will build up the discipline needed for it. After all, you are a strong and capable individual!

                                                3. I am strong and capable!

You have to realize that you are a strong and capable being. We were all born with different sets of skills, strengths, and talents. It all starts with confidence! If you don't have faith in yourself how do you expect others to believe in your capabilities? Developing your strengths, for practice, creates opportunities for improvement. Life becomes easier when you believe in yourself. Believing in yourself leaves no room for anxiety or doubts. You let go of limitations therefore you stop placing your skills in a box. Expand your horizon and be open to more possibilities. A hunter who has no confidence in his own skill will starve. If the warrior inside of you is hungry, you must trust the warrior within. Trust him or her to guide you toward your goals. Strength should come from the inside and should not be based on others' opinions. For power built upon the opinions of others has a very weak foundation.

                                 4. I am who I decide to become

You are not defined by the experiences that you have been through. They have only taught you lessons or given you insight into the way humanity tends to operate. We all have skeletons in our closets, but if you envision something better for yourself you must strive to become the person you wish to be. Have faith in yourself and do not be too hard on yourself. Enjoy the journey, for the journey, is what makes your story adventurous. After all, life wasn't meant to be boring, and it shouldn't be boring for you as well. Do what brings you joy, and take in the experiences. Living is a joy, even in unpleasant moments. Remember to practice balance for your own health and stability in life. Ask yourself who it is you want to become? Write down the traits you want to adopt in order to live a fulfilling lifestyle.

                            5. I let go of everything that no longer serves me!

Write down your trauma for it influences your behavior and your mindset. Write down the regrets and resentments that you hold onto. Define them in-depth on paper. Understand where the pain and limitations come from. These are the things that block personal development. Hold up the mirror in front of you and tell yourself that you let go of everything that no longer serves you. Let go of that which does not contribute to your happiness or growth. This will lift a weight off your shoulders. Let go of the burdens and pressure that you place upon yourself. You deserve to be free. Don't put extra unnecessary weight and worries onto your plate. Once you remove these burdens you will have more understanding and love for yourself. Good luck on your self-growth journey Storytime fans. Keep up the positive vibes, we need them in this world. Hope you guys have a fulfilling and joyful start in 2021.  Until the next adventure or story!